Lamp Life

I have an iPhone. I have a MacBook. I have used Apple handware for the great majority of things since about 1994. I can use PCs, I used to have a second tower PC for database and AutoCAD. I don’t anymore because my MacBook runs XP at the same time as OS X. 

I do this because I am a sucker for a good GUI. Ease of use is high on my list of features. And I would say that this applies to most designers, but especially ones that used to be architects. User Interface is king when every other feature seems like it’s pretty equitable across the board. 

So, if my iPhone can get email wirelessly, tell me the date of time of any city, collect weather, connect me to facebook, make phone calls, be an iPod, do that flipping turning thing and costs $499 why can’t my $40,000 light board have an approachable, intuitive UI?

I’m not even asking for email or texting. The Grand MA has space invaders on it for some reason, but is one of the least intuitive combinations of hardware and software I’ve ever seen. As much as I begrudge him, MS Office has that paper clip guy that wants to be so very helpful. Who told the lighting board makers that a proper help file ON the board was unnecessary? They extoll that their running XP embedded, so this shouldn’t be hard.  

So what do we pay $40,000 for? 

DMX control? If I can daisy chain 127 USB devices off of a single hub, and my $100 usb scanner, $50 Printer, $15 optical mouse, digital camera, bluetooth receiver, Ipod cable and so on could all be working off my $2000 computer without an issue, why doesn’t it take 30 minutes to set up a moving light to properly pan and tilt? Not only that but the scanner tells me it’s warning up, the printer tells me the toner level, the ipod charges and syncs, the bluetooth mouse tells me the battery level. 

Maybe Infotrace is the Answer or the RDM protocol, or whatever. Folks, I expect a bluetooth transmitter in a $10,000 light that will allow me get a laptop near the device and run diagnostics. Or maybe wifi so it will email me when a lamp goes out, and it could format that email for SMS texting… I can dream

Maybe it’s the Touch Screens? A $300 GPS has a better touch screen AND connects to satellites floating through space to tell me where I am. My iPhone is sharper and brighter and more responsive. Even if you covered the same area as the GrandMA’s touch screen with iPhones, it could still only be $10,000 and you’d have PLENTY of processing power.

Dedicated buttons? I can make whatever hot keys I want on either mac or pc. strange enough I’ve been able to remember that command-C is copy.

How about the ability to drag and drop cues? how about a logical interface for setting up windows? Maybe some drop down menus? Maybe an internet connection for direct downloads and automatic updates? 

It’s the stability in the show environment, right? Don’t make me laugh.  

Honestly, If you can get a car that syncs to you phone, DRIVES, has a computer to control cruise, an auto-dimming mirror, automatic headlamps and wipers, chips to figure out range and mileage, a navigation system, entertainment system and so on for less than a board that ultimately is sending one type of code to similar devices then something is widely screwed up. 

You know what, I propose an open-source board.  I want a board that rests on my laptop and can be carried around in a shoulder bag. Not this road case business. Why should I spend so much money to lug around an outdated piece of giant hardware. I want wireless notification of device status. I want tricorder like PDA or iphone diagnostics. I want logic in user interface. I want features to be apparent. I could care less about visualization, I want things to work, work right, work the first time, and not have to call someone’s buddy with more experience to spent 20 minutes having him walk through the inane menus. 

 Please?